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Infidelity – Working with a PI

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Infidelity is a hot button topic. It’s pretty much the reason why television shows that focus on exposing cheaters or unfaithful spouses tend to get incredible ratings! The drama involved when a private investigator catches a cheater red handed is almost hypnotic to watch.

In reality though, a good private investigator will handle your infidelity case with as much care and respect as is needed. In order to achieve this, there are certain rules that you will need to abide by when working with a private investigator or private investigation company. If you break these rules, chances are, you will either sabotage the case, or the private investigator will not want to work for you.

To help you determine what’s considered both good and bad behavior when working with a PI on your infidelity case, we’ve come up with a few ‘Do’s’ and ‘Don’ts’.


Do . . .


Ask For Updates

It is well within your rights to know and ask questions about how the case is progressing. Your private investigator is looking for proof of infidelity, so it only makes sense that they keep you updated. The kind of updates you will receive depends on the private investigator. Some will stay in contact throughout the day, or as they follow and observe your spouse or partner. Others will provide the information to you later, after your spouse or partner has returned home. Either way, try to remain calm. It’s the private investigators job to get information and then give you that information.


Tell the PI Everything You Know

If you have hired a private investigator, chances are you already suspect that your spouse or partner is cheating. It could be that you overheard a phone call, saw a text message, or even several emails. What you want from a private investigator is cold, hard evidence that your spouse is cheating. Therefore, you should tell them everything you know, or suspect, because it will help the private investigator to develop their plan. For example, if you suspect that your partner is having an affair because they leave the house every night at 10 PM, a private investigator will likely want to wait in a parked car outside your house to find out where they are going at 10 PM.


Expect a Report

Whatever the private investigator uncovers, at the end of the case they will provide you with a detailed report. This report will include any evidence or proof that you need to confront your cheating spouse. It might also include good news: that your spouse isn’t cheating at all! And finally, it might actually reveal that your spouse isn’t cheating, but is engaged in other illegal activities.

A private investigator’s job is to take on a case, use their experience and tools to uncover the truth about the situation, and report and present that information to the client (you).

If the private investigator you are working with does not present a report to you, or seems a bit flakey with the information they do give to you, it is within your right to ask for more details. We’re not saying that you should text your private investigator every ten minutes, but if the case is closed and you’re left feeling like you don’t have all the pieces, it’s time to have a chat.


Don’t . . .


Follow Your PI

There is often the urge as a client to want to know what’s going on with the case. We highly recommend that you do not give into this urge and follow your private investigator.

We understand. Infidelity is something that is very painful and more than ever, you just want to see for yourself whether or not your partner is cheating. The problem is, you are not a trained private investigator. Following your private investigator or interfering in the case in any way could lead to your spouse finding out and changing their behavior. Also, while you might dream of confronting your partner and their lover face to face, this really isn’t something a private investigator would allow because the situation will likely escalate and get out of control.


Confront Your Partner

When you are working with your private investigator, it is highly likely that you will need to keep that fact a secret. The moment your partner thinks or suspects that they’ve been caught; they will likely stop whatever it is they are doing. As hard as it might be, you will need to act like nothing has changed, that everything is normal. This will prevent your spouse from changing plans or altering their behavior and will help the private investigator to uncover the truth.

While the private investigator is doing their job, it is also important not to confront your spouse about your suspicions. Again, this will make your partner suspicious. They will likely change their behavior and your private investigator will not get the information or proof they need.

The bottom line? While you are working with your private investigator, do your best to act as though nothing has changed. This will greatly increase your odds of uncovering the truth.


Pretend You’re a Private Investigator

Leave the late nights and seedy situations to your private investigator. The moment you try to pretend that you know what to do when it comes to private investigation techniques, you’re actually breaking the law. Private investigators require a license. If anyone asks to see your license, you could receive a fine, not to mention lose your partner’s trust.

The best thing to do if you suspect your spouse is having an affair is to contact a private investigation firm. They will assign the right individual to your case, and that individual will have all the right tools and experience to find proof of any infidelity quickly and efficiently.


Blame Your Private Investigator

We’ve experienced situations where our client wants us to prove that their spouse is cheating, only to discover that their spouse is only working late hours at the office. In some situations, this news is upsetting to our client. They believe, with all their heart that their partner is cheating. In these cases, the client blames our private investigators for not doing their jobs correctly, or lying about what we’ve found.

At the same time, we’ve had situations where we did uncover evidence that a spouse was cheating, which only made the client mad. The client then blamed our investigators.

It is our job to uncover and present the truth to our clients, we will never lie or give false information.

Need more information on our private investigation services? Reach out to us by phone: (647) 479-8474 or email:

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